Sorry guys, this post isn’t about Zooey Deschanel. It’s about my “dream girl”, and no it’s still not about Zooey Deschanel. So this topic has come up a lot in recent conversations and it’s really got me thinking as to who my dream girl would be. And it hit me not too long ago, that I don’t have a “dream girl”. As in, I can’t point to one individual who represents everything I want in a woman. Instead, I have a list of abstract ideas and characteristics that would make up said girl. So while we’re on the topic, let’s get to discussing!
She absolutely has to be Christian, and even though it’s an obvious one, it can be hard. I know a really great girl who is amazing in every aspect of the word, but she is not a Christian. I don’t think a relationship would work out long term between me and her because we don’t have the same spiritual beliefs. How would we raise children? Celebrate holidays? How could I grow closer to Christ if my “other half” is not? Despite the fact that I would love to marry her, I simply couldn’t. And that thought is a bit heart breaking when I think about it. But more then just being Christian, it has to be what defines her as a person. Not just someone who said the prayer and goes to church on Sunday.
This is probably the most important, right after Christian. My future wife has to be able to make me laugh, and I have to be able to make her laugh as well. I couldn’t imagine living with someone for 50+ years and having completely different senses of humor. I’m not saying we have to have the same sense of humor or find the same things funny, because we don’t. But if I don’t know how to make her laugh and she can’t make me laugh, there’s really no point in going further in a relationship. Heck, I don’t think I would ever even date a girl who couldn’t make me laugh. Even if it’s our own little sense of humor that nobody else gets, it has to be there.
Yes, another stereotypical trait when looking for a spouse (I promise, they are gonna get more interesting!). Now I don’t mean grades here, she could limp through school with a 2.0 GPA, doesn’t matter to me. Never confuse education with intelligence! I want to be able to discuss things with my wife in a serious manner, and even if she doesn’t know much about the topic, she could still listen to my ideas and point out how flawed they are logically, but not in a mean way. Which brings me to my next one…
This one probably sounds dumb, but let me explain. When I say nice, I don’t mean she has to say sweet things to me that makes me happy. Sure, that plays a role, but I would say a minor role. I’m more concerned with how she treats other people. If we’re on a date and she treats me great, but is terribly rude to the waiter… she’s probably not a nice person. Not a fake niceness either, I’m talking the legit real deal. People want to be around her because she’s so nice. I want to marry a woman people like.
I absolutely love to watch movies, it’s easily one of my favorite things to do. I love going to concerts and listening to music (who honestly doesn’t like music?!). And I love to watch certain television shows (the office!). Now most people would say that they have to marry someone who likes this certain type of genre or what have you. And I use to think that way too. But it hit me not too long ago, that even if the girl loved Twilight, Jonas Brothers, and Greys Anatomy, if she enjoyed those products and could tell me why she enjoys them to the same degree that I could tell you why I love 500 Days of Summer and Lecrae, then I honestly don’t care what it is you like. If you’re passionate about Polka Music and Spanish romance films, more power to you.
Something that kind of goes along with the last topic, I want to marry a girl that likes to read. She doesn’t have to read a book a week, or have to be able to discuss and contrast romantic and realist writings, but I would like to be able to suggest a book for her to read and know that she will read it. I’m not a huge reader, but I do enjoy the good book, and she has to as well.
I’m not sure if this one can be compromised on; I love road trips and if I’m going to be spending my life with you… well they better enjoy them as well! I can’t think of a better way to spend a summer then a country wide road trip with the woman I love, I honestly can’t. And if she finds that idea to be horrible, I just don’t think it will work out.
I want to have a family one day, ideally I would like to have four kids. Two boys and two girls. Of course, I can’t really control that, but I would love to have that one day. So of course I need to marry a woman who wants kids, now if she’s dead-set on having three kids or whatever, that’s fine. Or if she can’t conceive children for whatever reason, that’s fine too. There is always adoption! But she needs to have that desire to have children for our future family.
Finally, she has to be pretty. And I don’t mean in the skewed norms society has placed on looks, I mean in my eyes… she has to be pretty. And honestly if she meets the other categories, I’m going to thinks she’s the most beautiful girl in the world. I would be easy if I had a “type” but I don’t really. I think there are a lot of girls who are pretty, who fall into different “types” (types, what is that? Have we really boiled down all women into distinctly different “types”? Wow, I hate that term).
So there you have it, my criteria for the future Mrs. Phil (wow that was weird to type)! Umm, any questions or comments, feel free to leave him here!!