What I’ve learned about Sociology

Sociology, besides being that easy class in high school that all the stoners and jocks signed up for, is a popular field of pseudoscience.  Holds that the mind is a “tabula rasa” or ‘blank slate’, and that human psychology is shaped primarily by cultural forces rather than biological influences.  Modern sociology is based largely on the teachings of NBA basketballer and devil-hunter Shaq, who demonstrated in his seminal lectures on Turtle Morphology that biology is evil.

Sociology started off as a joke among the higher class bourgeoise, who attempted to fix the reputation of Germans as being totally impotent when it comes to humor.  The project went horribly wrong from the start, but nobody wanted to take the blame, so everyone pretended they were having fun.  The very first sociological theories were created by Baron Durkheim.

This went on for years without anyone telling Durkheim that he wasn’t being funny.  During this time lots of very, very thick books were written by people like Durkheim.  These books were mostly random words in foreign language put together, and this was apparently funny.  The best known author of one of these books was Marx.  His most famous work, the Capital, was named after the amount of bullcrap he managed to write down on paper.

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