Explore the Cave that is my Chest

Wow, where do I begin!  First just let me say, contrary to what people think; the fact that I have never had a girlfriend does not make me Gay.  Although, knowing that people look down on me because of it hurts very much.  It doesn’t make me any less of a person, or a guy because I have never had a girlfriend.  It something I have struggled with and to get it thrown back in my face makes it that much harder to recover from.

Secondly, I don’t appreciate being looked down upon because I’m a “Calvinist”.  I worship the same God other Christians do.  I don’t think any other Christian is going to go to Hell for thinking differently, and I don’t appreciate it when someone wants to turn a disscussion into a debate.  I understand that not everyone is going to agree with me, but if someone is asking me questions it’s because they want to know my opionion, not what your opinion of my opinion is.

Thirdly, I desperately need to find a job!  If I can’t find a job by the start of next semester, I have no idea how I’m going to continue to go to school and live down here.  I don’t know what to do!  I am restricted to the jobs I can apply to because I have no car/license so really it’s just on campus stuff and nothing is ever open it seems!  I don’t even need that much money. $100 a week would be more than enough.  I won’t be able to afford rent, tuition, food, anything.

Fourthly, God is so great!  I’m seeing God do such great things right now it’s amazing.  I know my life is pretty rough, but that’s not important.  I can see God softing a friends heart and it’s amazing!  I keep praying for her and seeing God work through different people and different events is just awesome.  Let me tell you what was told to me, six hours on the cross while his holy blood flowed for me!  I worship him for that.  How can you not, once you see how amazing God is, the only thing you want to do is lay your life down for him, pick up your own cross and follow Christ.  Lord it’s amazing all of the places that you put us, so amazing, the stages you put us on God we don’t want any of that glory.  Father God make us invisible, Father we want to decrease that you might increase.


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